Fake it till you make it.
The number one reason why so many people are living an unhappy life is that most people are faking a life they don’t have, or trying to fake their way to success. This idea about ‘fake it till you make’ has created more insecurities in people, sadness, and depression.
The whole idea of “fake it till you make it” was coined from the law of attraction which admonished us to “think and act like the person we want to become”. It never said fake the person you would want to become. It rather unfortunate that most people have taken this idea to an extreme and it’s now causing more damage in society.
In one of my coaching sessions, a lovely brilliant lady told me about the pressure she feels, and how she’s tired of not being her true self. She complained of always being anxious and scared. I had to ask her why the anxiety, stress, and the feeling of pressure. She opened up and said she has been living a “packaged life”. That in her industry, it takes that kind of image to be successful.
I asked her why does she still fake it when she’s already successful. She simply replied that she can’t stop because her whole career is built upon the image she has created.
It is quite understandable for people to want to live a fake life due to the current pressure in our society, especially from social media. The only problem with the idea of faking it till you make it is that it makes you live life looking over your shoulder, and it hurts your confidence.
Reasons Why You Should Never Fake It till You Make It
1. You live a Defensive Life
Anyone not living true to themselves has a high tendency of becoming defensive and also neurotic. You’ll always want to prove that you’re worthy. Small comments can easily get to you because you’ll feel attacked, or rather you’ll feel your identity is being questioned. And it can affect your level of productivity if you’re working in an organization. Instead of faking it, trying being yourself, visualize where you want to go or who you want to be, set goals for yourself, and work your way through, this way you’ll simply unfold your true self and hidden potentials. There is more joy living your true self than a fake one. You’ll live life completely free.
2. Easily Develop an Imposter Syndrome
Imposter syndrome is the act of living life in constant fear – fear of being discovered as a fraud. Although normal people also get the feeling of imposter syndrome, faking your life is the surest way of enveloping your mind with guilt which can lead to the feeling of being an imposter. It doesn’t only limit your happiness in life or work, it can lead to severe neurosis or depression.
3. It inhibits Growth
Instead of seeking growth and development, your focus will be more on trying to protect the identity you’ve developed for yourself. You’ll live life anxiously and insecure, and these two factors can inhibit your growth and development. It makes no sense faking your life when naturally, everyone is perfect, and our imperfection also makes us all unique, and through our imperfections, we get to complement each other. So, instead of fake it till you make it, be yourself till you make it. Unfold yourself gradually and be true to yourself. You can never give what you don’t have. If you pretend to have it, you’ll live your life looking over your shoulders. That is like driving a car looking backward, I’m sure you can tell what the results can be.
4. Getting Help Becomes Difficult
Faking a life, you don’t have can make getting help in life difficult because people assume you have it all. It takes more effort and energy to convince people that you’re actually in need. I remember an instance sometime back when a friend was in trouble and needed financial assistance. No one agreed to help out because most people saw him as rich and comfortable, that he was only pulling our legs but in reality, he was going through serious challenges.
Don’t fake a life you don’t have; you might end up in serious trouble and find it difficult getting help.
5. You Live a Double Life
This can be seen as a norm nowadays especially on social media like Instagram. Everyone keeps posting a side of themselves that doesn’t exist. They borrow to service their lifestyle and end up not actually growing in reality. Living a double life isn’t only stressful, its time consuming and financially not advisable. A double life can make life difficult to live because you’ll be anxious that no one finds out you’re a fraud or a liar. It takes too much energy to live a fake life and you’ll require more efforts to grow in life.
6. Push You into Debts
Trying to live up to the Joneses can put you into serious financial trouble. What if you fake it and don’t make it? What happens to all the debt you’ve accumulated just to fake it?
Logically it doesn’t make sense going into debt just to impress people who might not necessarily care about how you look or what you do. Everyone is caught up trying to figure out their lives, and you’re going into debt just to convince others that you have it all figured out. it can be insanity.
This process not only limits your growth, but it also adds more years to your growth process. You’ll require more time to pay up your debt before even thinking of setting up your own life.
“Fake it till you make it” is not a great idea for anyone who wants to enjoy true happiness and long-term joy in life. It is a path of laziness that can only lead you to problems because you’ll always look to seek validations rather than true accomplishment.
Instead of to fake it till you make it, why don’t you be it till you make it. Be yourself, visualize who you want to become, set goals, and work towards becoming it. This way you’ll enjoy life and also enjoy the process of becoming something great in life, and you’d also have a worthwhile story to tell.
If you have any other reasons why it’s bad to fake it till you make it, or if you think it’s a great idea to fake it till you make it, kindly leave a comment below let us share your thought.